Shopping Cart
Your Cart is Empty
Quantity:
Subtotal
Taxes
Shipping
Total
There was an error with PayPalClick here to try again
CelebrateThank you for your business!You should be receiving an order confirmation from Paypal shortly.Exit Shopping Cart

Razan's Therapeutic Services

Articles

Articles

STONEWALLING

Posted on February 10, 2019 at 11:45 PM

STONEWALLING

What is it and do you do it ??

The second behavior that predicts divorce with over 90% accuracy, according to John Gottman's research and the experience of most couples' counselors, is stonewalling. Different from an occasional timeout to calm down or collect your thoughts, stonewalling is absolute refusal to consider your partner’s perspective. If you listen at all, you do it dismissively or contemptuously.

The common songs of the stonewaller are:

“Just leave me alone…”

“Do whatever you want...”

“End of conversation…”

“Stop talking...”

“Get out of my face…”

“That’s enough…”

“I’ve had it!”

The other divorce-predictive behaviors – criticism, defensiveness, and contempt - are gender neutral, i.e., men and women do them more or less equally.

Frustrating vs. Painful

The experience of being stonewalled tends to be different for men and women. Men who are stonewalled feel frustrated – their goal of resolution is blocked by the stonewalling. But the experience is downright painful for women who are stonewalled, as they are apt to feel isolated – a sense that no one cares about them. To understand the effects of stonewalling on most women, a man need only think of how bad humiliation feels. That’s how isolation feels to his partner, which is why she tries so hard to break through the stone wall.


Looks Different on the Outside

While stonewalling can look aggressive, mean, or childish from the outside, if feels very different on the inside. The defensive stonewaller feels like he’s trying to protect himself. He can also think that he’s protecting his family. Not only have I observed this countless times in my clients, I experienced it my personal life. Knowledge is power.


Categories: Relationships, Self Awareness

Post a Comment

Oops!

Oops, you forgot something.

Oops!

The words you entered did not match the given text. Please try again.

629 Comments

Reply alexander mcqueen
5:05 AM on January 26, 2022 
A lot of thanks for each of your work on this web page. My aunt really loves doing investigation and it's simple to grasp why. My partner and i hear all of the compelling ways you give functional things via your web blog and in addition strongly encourage participation from some other people about this concept plus my daughter is always studying a great deal. Take advantage of the rest of the new year. You have been performing a stunning job.
alexander mcqueen http://www.alexandermcqueenoutlet.us
Reply Broombutpu
6:41 AM on January 26, 2022 
cost tadalafil generic tadalafil cialis
Reply Erollerly
10:02 AM on January 26, 2022 
Oppdwg prednisone versus prednisolone
Reply nike kyrie 7
10:19 AM on January 26, 2022 
I intended to post you the little bit of note to finally say thanks a lot over again relating to the extraordinary knowledge you've provided here. It's quite strangely open-handed of people like you to give unreservedly just what a number of us could possibly have made available as an e book to make some profit for themselves, especially given that you could have done it if you ever desired. The guidelines as well served to be a great way to understand that someone else have the same interest similar to my own to understand somewhat more with regards to this problem. I'm certain there are thousands of more fun instances up front for those who look into your blog.
nike kyrie 7 http://www.kyrie-7.com
Reply yeezy
1:54 PM on January 26, 2022 
I as well as my pals ended up checking the good points from the blog while immediately I got an awful suspicion I had not expressed respect to you for those strategies. These women happened to be so glad to see them and now have clearly been tapping into these things. Many thanks for genuinely indeed considerate and for picking out these kinds of essential themes millions of individuals are really desperate to be aware of. Our sincere regret for not expressing gratitude to sooner.
yeezy http://www.yeezy-shoes.us.org
Reply supreme clothing
3:47 PM on January 26, 2022 
I wish to express my appreciation to the writer for bailing me out of this type of instance. Just after surfing around through the internet and getting tips which were not helpful, I assumed my entire life was gone. Being alive minus the answers to the difficulties you've sorted out through the article is a crucial case, as well as those which could have negatively affected my career if I had not come across your web blog. Your personal competence and kindness in dealing with the whole thing was crucial. I don't know what I would've done if I hadn't come upon such a subject like this. I can also at this time look ahead to my future. Thanks a lot very much for the high quality and amazing help. I will not be reluctant to suggest your blog post to any person who needs and wants direction on this subject.
supreme clothing http://www.supreme-clothings.us.com
Reply paul george
3:47 PM on January 26, 2022 
Thank you so much for giving everyone an exceptionally remarkable chance to check tips from this web site. It is often so ideal and also packed with fun for me personally and my office fellow workers to search your blog at the least three times in one week to find out the latest items you have got. And definitely, I'm just actually impressed considering the very good pointers you give. Some 4 areas in this post are basically the very best I have ever had.
paul george http://www.paulgeorge.us.com
Reply curry shoes
6:07 PM on January 26, 2022 
I definitely wanted to write down a simple message in order to express gratitude to you for all of the lovely techniques you are placing on this site. My time intensive internet look up has now been rewarded with awesome suggestions to exchange with my relatives. I would repeat that most of us visitors actually are definitely fortunate to dwell in a fabulous website with many awesome people with very beneficial concepts. I feel extremely blessed to have discovered your web site and look forward to really more exciting times reading here. Thank you once again for a lot of things.
curry shoes http://www.curry8.us
Reply side effects of tadalafil
6:36 AM on January 27, 2022 
generic cialis online fast shipping best price usa tadalafil
Reply kyrie shoes
8:00 PM on January 27, 2022 
Needed to create you a very small word in order to thank you so much once again for those splendid secrets you have documented on this site. It's really generous of you to make unhampered just what a few individuals could possibly have offered for an e book in making some bucks on their own, primarily considering that you could possibly have done it in the event you considered necessary. Those tips likewise served like the great way to be sure that some people have the identical interest the same as my personal own to understand way more with regards to this problem. I am sure there are millions of more pleasant instances up front for individuals who look over your site.
kyrie shoes http://www.kyrie4shoes.us
Reply lebron 17
10:42 PM on January 27, 2022 
I want to show my appreciation for your kind-heartedness supporting people who really want help with this subject. Your very own dedication to getting the solution along had become exceedingly advantageous and have specifically made professionals much like me to arrive at their goals. Your entire helpful useful information can mean this much to me and much more to my colleagues. Best wishes; from each one of us.
lebron 17 http://www.lebron17s.us
Reply golden goose
6:02 AM on January 28, 2022 
I in addition to my friends were actually looking at the good ideas on the website and so unexpectedly I had an awful suspicion I never expressed respect to the site owner for those techniques. Those guys came certainly stimulated to learn all of them and have really been loving them. Many thanks for genuinely well accommodating as well as for going for variety of very good areas millions of individuals are really needing to be aware of. My sincere apologies for not expressing appreciation to you sooner.
golden goose http://www.goldengoosesneakers.us.org
Reply Erollerly
8:37 AM on January 28, 2022 
Prednisone Nexium Discount Card
Reply yeezy 350
10:10 AM on January 28, 2022 
I wish to express some appreciation to you just for bailing me out of this particular predicament. Just after exploring throughout the online world and getting techniques that were not powerful, I assumed my entire life was done. Existing minus the approaches to the problems you've sorted out by means of the short article is a critical case, as well as those which may have in a wrong way damaged my career if I had not encountered your blog. Your good competence and kindness in dealing with every item was useful. I don't know what I would've done if I hadn't come across such a thing like this. It's possible to at this time look forward to my future. Thanks a lot so much for this skilled and result oriented guide. I will not hesitate to propose your web site to any individual who will need care about this situation.
yeezy 350 http://www.yeezy350s.com
Reply off white
10:11 AM on January 28, 2022 
I simply wished to say thanks all over again. I do not know the things I would've followed in the absence of those advice discussed by you on such subject. It was a very traumatic scenario in my circumstances, however , noticing the very professional technique you treated the issue made me to leap over gladness. Now i'm happier for the help and in addition have high hopes you comprehend what a great job you have been carrying out training the rest with the aid of your website. I am certain you haven't met any of us.
off white http://www.off--white.us.com
Reply jordan shoes
10:11 AM on January 28, 2022 
I would like to express my thanks to this writer for rescuing me from this issue. As a result of searching throughout the world wide web and getting basics that were not beneficial, I figured my entire life was done. Existing devoid of the strategies to the problems you have sorted out by means of the short post is a critical case, as well as those that might have in a negative way damaged my entire career if I hadn't noticed your website. Your good competence and kindness in maneuvering a lot of stuff was important. I don't know what I would've done if I hadn't come across such a point like this. I can at this moment look ahead to my future. Thanks a lot very much for this reliable and sensible help. I won't be reluctant to suggest your site to anyone who should have direction about this topic.
jordan shoes http://www.jordanssneakers.us.com
Reply supreme hoodie
10:11 AM on January 28, 2022 
I precisely wished to say thanks again. I do not know what I would have undertaken in the absence of these creative concepts revealed by you concerning that area of interest. This has been an absolute scary issue in my view, but witnessing this professional approach you dealt with it forced me to leap over gladness. Extremely happier for this work and in addition have high hopes you recognize what a powerful job you have been providing educating other individuals via your blog post. Most probably you've never encountered any of us.
supreme hoodie http://www.supremeshoodie.com
Reply kawhi leonard shoes
10:12 AM on January 28, 2022 
I simply wanted to thank you very much again. I am not sure the things that I might have tried without those opinions documented by you concerning that area of interest. Certainly was a very challenging setting in my view, but understanding a expert technique you treated it made me to cry over gladness. I am just happy for the advice and have high hopes you know what an amazing job your are carrying out instructing most people through your web site. More than likely you haven't encountered any of us.
kawhi leonard shoes http://www.kawhileonardshoes.us
Reply hermes
10:13 AM on January 28, 2022 
I simply wanted to appreciate you again. I do not know the things that I would have handled without those thoughts revealed by you regarding this theme. It actually was a real intimidating difficulty for me, however , taking note of the skilled technique you dealt with it took me to jump over fulfillment. Now i am thankful for your work and as well , wish you are aware of a powerful job that you are undertaking educating many people using your webpage. I am sure you have never encountered all of us.
hermes http://www.hermesonlineshop.com
Reply birkin bag
3:19 PM on January 28, 2022 
I have to show some appreciation to the writer just for rescuing me from this type of matter. After searching through the the net and getting tricks that were not productive, I figured my life was gone. Being alive devoid of the approaches to the difficulties you have sorted out as a result of your entire review is a critical case, as well as ones which may have negatively damaged my career if I hadn't noticed the website. Your primary mastery and kindness in maneuvering every aspect was crucial. I don't know what I would've done if I hadn't encountered such a thing like this. I can at this moment relish my future. Thanks so much for the professional and amazing guide. I will not be reluctant to recommend the blog to any individual who will need guidelines about this subject.
birkin bag http://www.hermesbirkins.com